Last week I was amazed by the over 100 comments we received about Is It Possible to Do Financial Harm to a Client?
There have been a number of other contributors to the conversation as well, including guest posts by Kate Svoboda and Adam King. With more guest posts coming.
When I was a paramedic, I took a pledge, an oath really, to “Do no harm.” This accepted the reality that sometimes, as a helper, the person in need was beyond my help, but that I would at least not do any harm.
This was an inspiring, humbling oath to take. And it’s a concept that I think translates into business extremely well. But it needs to take into account two (three) aspects.
The First Aspect: Hurting Others
The first aspect is what most people think of, to not harm the client. It goes beyond not swindling them. Even if you are heart-centered and ethical, there are psychologically powerful influences during a sales conversation that you, as the seller, should be aware of.
Accounting for those influences is important, especially when selling anything motivational or inspirational in nature.
The Second Aspect: Hurting Yourself
The second aspect is the other side of the coin. The trouble with most heart-centered business owners is not that they are inspiring people into spending too much, but that they aren’t providing for themselves. They take too much responsibility.
And, sometimes people make a choice to go into debt from a responsible, eyes-wide-open place. You don’t want to treat your clients as children.
Bonus: A Third Aspect As Well
What do you do when you see another business owner doing something that you suspect is causing harm?
It’s another nuanced situation. My spiritual path has very strong warnings against gossip or speaking ill of others, and, at the same time, supports the disenfranchised in speaking up about abuse of power.
We’re in mushy, dangerous territory.
The Do No Financial Harm Pledge [Draft]
As an ethical, heart-centered, business owner, I commit myself and anyone else on my team to the following principles:
1. To care for my clients’ financial well-being, which includes:
- When interviewing potential clients, asking them about their ability to pay in a compassionate manner, that supports them in thinking responsibly about their financial situation.
- For significant purchases my discount and other deadlines are set to allow for both a cooling-off period and the ability for the potential client to discuss the purchase with others.
- If through the client interview above I find that purchasing would critically impair the potential client’s ability to feed, clothe or house themselves or their family, I will recommend more affordable alternatives.
2. To care for my business’ financial well-being, which includes:
- Charging prices that allow the business to be profitable and allow those who work for the business, including myself as the owner, to be receive comfortable compensation.
- Cheerfully and humbly accepting payment from those who have the ability and willingness to pay prices that allow for profitability.
- Once having interviewed a client and given them the time to reflect, discuss and make their own decision, I trust their ability to make that decision.
3. To care for the financial well-being of my industry, which includes:
- Being a stand for Do No Financial Harm, which means being a voice for these principles where appropriate.
- To not recommend, privately or in public, businesses that I know for certain are using unethical tactics to sell.
Your Turn
Would you take this pledge? Things you would change?
p.s. The Leap: From Struggling to Really, Truly Making It
Ready, set… Ready, set… Ready….
If it seems you’re ready, but your business never truly gets going, Opening the Moneyflow may be the support you are needing.
Start with the free learning series, and, if it’s right for you, join us for the full year-long program. Registration is open and applications are coming in. But, you don’t have to fill out an application to jump into the free learning series.
72 Responses
I cheerfully and proudly sign this.
I would add something along the lines of “Open this conversation up with others” in other words, let’s keep this conversation growing. I see the Occupy Movement as part of desire to have justice in the world and this is a justice conversation, too.
Thank you Mark.
Signed! Excellent first draft!
My suggested addition to Part 1:
– I will give my clients and customers a true and accurate impression of my products and services.
It’s so obvious it almost goes without saying, but I think it’s worth saying.
To open up the conversation: What about customer interactions where there’s no interview? (For example, a high-end information product.)
If this pledge is to apply to a wide range of heart-centered business owners, and not just coaches, let’s make sure it’s broad enough to gain widespread adoption.
The first draft of the pledge covers the cooling-off period, and my suggestion covers truth and accuracy.
What’s the business owner’s responsibility, if any, beyond that?
Thanks for adding this Pace, it feels really important. I am moving toward less interaction with students so I can write more in 2012 and I want to be sure and be accurate about what I promise. I have certainly fallen into the hype mode in the past, both out of wanting to express how good what I’m offering is and also from a sort of struggling to keep up with the hype. 🙂
Hi Pace- great questions. I think there could be something about refunds, but I hesitate to get that granular- each business owner needs to set their own limits about when a refund is acceptable and when it isn’t…. I think… hmmm…
I agree, Pace, I think there is so much fuzzy information about what is being delivered, whether intentional, or out of overwhelm or neglect.
What I deeply admire are business owners who aren’t afraid to speak to the limits of what they offer — and speak to what they can’t promise.
This is such an important issue, Mark. Thank you for having the courage to raise it so publicly.
After my “Oh cool” giddiness wore off here are some thoughts:
One issue it raised for me is the importance of first being clear and honest with what I want and need. I know I can get very caught up with first wanting to know what other people need including clients. I end up more or less abdicating my accountability to myself and my business.
I see your declaration as a starting point for what I and my business stand for. I’d like to revisit it after a few days once I’m in a more centered, less giddy space.
And I’m looking forward to the discussion this will get going because it will push many of us, certainly myself, to examine our values and what we really stand for.
Blessings,
Judy
Mark-
Do you mean “being a stand” or “taking a stand”?
Doug- I meant what I wrote, but I think it’s incorrect usage… I’ll take the edit. 🙂
Re: Gossip/Speaking Ill of Others
Mark-
I think it’s useful (although tricky, tricky, tricky) to be willing, when asked a direct question along the lines of “Who do you think I should avoid?”, to be able to reply something like, “Look, I’m not able to look into other people’s hearts. At the same time, for me, I’m not comfortable with the approach I see from Jane Doe’s Invincible Websites program. It’s not my style.” To my mind, gossip is closer to expressing the judgments we make about others (i.e., “Well, I think Jane Doe is really being crass and hypocritical in her Invincible Websites program.”)
What do you think?
Doug
Doug- I think you’re right. 🙂
I recently told a friend and colleague who asked me about my experience with someone she was considering investing highly in: I had the following negative experience with that person. Here’s what I take responsibility for, here’s what I didn’t like about what they chose to do.
I shared my recommendations and encouragement that she do her due diligence before investing.
Well said! Here’s where it gets really fuzzy for me : when someone comes to me (client or friend) and tells me about a professional experience with someone else that I find distressing. Maybe a number of people over time speak up about an event or a coach. But I have not experienced any of this personally. Do I have any responsibility for this in our “community?” I have decided no as it would be gossip but it makes me uncomfortable.
Case by case! Perhaps, if you qualify any statements *you* make with “while I have no personal experience of this sort, (or ‘with this person or program’) but several people (whose judgement I respect, named or not – your option) have (fill in the blank)” ?
And, only when you’re talking about ‘first hand’ experience…
I agree that “my friend’s Aunt’s hairdresser” ‘s story may go into *your* mental Caution file, but probably shouldn’t be passed on as ‘fact’.
that’s helpful thanks
All you can do is be the kind, soulful gal you already are, Jen!
I’ve been in the same position as Isabel. It’s a tough one. In each instance I try to give the most fair and honest answer I can without being unnecessarily complex either.
Like you, Jen, I struggle with “how much to say” within the community/ies I’m a part of. Am I coming from a place of ego? The desire for justice? A burning but perhaps irrational hunger for the TRUTH to be heard?
What *needs* to be heard and what’s gratuitous detail?
Everyone loves to watch a train wreck.
Let’s be as real as we can about it (publicly) when it feels right to do so. It’s all we can do.
yes I think the main thing for me to watch out for is my inflated and not helpful sense of justice. It’s embarrassing on my part to be such a hot head. I have benefited from this conversation so much just seeing that. Thanks!~
Jen,
I think privately it’s easier to speak with some nuance about what we’ve heard or concerns we have.
I think it’s much trickier to publicly initiate criticism of what someone else it doing. I support those who name the dynamics they see at play to their community (much as Mark did with his “icky selling from the stage”), and to encourage those in your community to ask the key questions or take the steps to protect themselves.
That way you aren’t silent in the face of injustice, you’re helping educate and empower your community, and you’re letting the “culprits” figure it out for themselves.
“Inflated and not helpful sense of justice”? Jen, that would be me. It leads seamlessly into a sense of personal responsibility to protect *the whole world* from having the experience I had, without ever being unfair to the seller. This is, of course, impossible, but I somehow become responsible for it anyway.
Then, I dunno, I might read something some wise person wrote about ‘enoughness’ or something and get a grip.
I’ve found there’s a lot to be said for, ‘Well, when I was getting this work done, I hired X and this was my experience.’ Maybe also, ‘… and I heard from a friend who had similar experiences.’ I’d say this when asked about X specifically, and perhaps when asked for a recommendation of someone who does what X does. It seems to cut that Responsibility Monster down to size.
well said Isabel, I agree.
thanks Hillary! I wonder who said that about enougness??? 🙂
Mark-
The piece that’s needs more fleshing out for me here is some assessment on the part of the practitioner of the potential client’s readiness for the services the practitioner is selling. IMHO, it’s not just having “interviewed a client and given them the time to reflect, discuss and make their own decision”, it’s also putting hard questions to them about their readiness.
As I read the guidelines right now, they indicate that there is NO set of circumstances under which one would turn down a client who is willing to pay, even if the practitioner is genuinely convinced that the client will receive little or no benefit. I don’t see the heart in that….
Doug
I’m not sure how I word that, Doug. I’ve had folks take our Heart of Money courses and get no immediate benefit, but a year later everything clicks- they just needed time to integrate. I think it’s tricky, tricky about how to flesh that out. I settled on this:
“- When interviewing potential clients, asking them both about their ability to pay and their ability to receive benefit from the product or service in a compassionate manner, that supports them in thinking responsibly about their financial situation.”
Mark-
I like that very much–it feels very heartful to me. I think it puts the responsibility where it ultimately belongs, on the client. At the same time, it keeps the conversation in the context of a transaction. I aspire to such a level of balance!
Doug
P.S. I think that moving the last comma up a bit would really improve your excellent statement: “When interviewing potential clients, asking them both about their ability to pay and their ability to receive benefit from the product or service, in a compassionate manner that supports them in thinking responsibly about their financial situation.
Mark-
I think point 3 is setting the bar too low: “To not recommend, privately or in public, businesses that I know for certain are using unethical tactics to sell.”
Bear in mind that we’re talking about recommending, rather than criticizing.
Why would someone recommend businesses that they reasonably believe, or reasonably suspect, are using unethical tactics to sell? Why set the bar at “I know for certain” for recommendations?
I think this gets my concern across.
“Hey Doug, it’s Mark. Would you recommend XYZ Plumbers?”
“Mark, I sure would recommend XYZ Plumbers. After all, I only suspect that they’re using unethical tactics. I don’t know for certain.”
Doug (who is now going to stop procrastinating on the other stuff he needs to do)
Doug,
If I may step in —
Perhaps what’s needed is a clarification of “recommend”, one that includes promoting, retweeting, participating in programs offered by (for example as an interviewee), etc.
Maybe something like “To not endorse, privately or in public, explicitly or implicitly, businesses that I believe are using unethical tactics to sell.”
Thanks, Pace-
I’m fine with recommend. For me, the juice is in the distinction between “businesses that I know for certain” and “businesses that I believe”.
Doug
Right on.
I agree that “know for certain” weakens the pledge too much.
Well, one of my core defenses is to avoid conflict, so I may have not stood as strongly in this as I could have. It’s a good point. I just wasn’t quite sure how to word it. I didn’t want to support people flaming each other without proof.
I’m wondering how to phrase this, Doug. As I said elsewhere, I didn’t want to support people flaming others without clarity in their own hearts. And yet, you have a great point.
Pace- you’ve got a good one there… I like it.
Hi Mark,
I love this direction. It’s much needed.
Our economy ought to be about making the world a livable place for all. Children are being raised from the get-go to step on others to get to the top.
The top of what, though? What kind of view does one have from the top if it’s littered with starving, suffering, or cheated folks?
We reward the strangest things.
Many thanks for forging this path … G.
Amen, Giulietta!
Happy Day-Before-Turkey-Day, Mark!
I am joyfully signing, even in advance of having a business to apply it to, because this pledge so clearly expresses “How I intend to live my whole life”!
Bright Blessings ~ Karen
I particularly like this part of the pledge:
“For significant purchases my discount and other deadlines are set to allow for both a cooling-off period and the ability for the potential client to discuss the purchase with others.”
I find that, even amongst people discussing “ethical marketing”, or “low pressure sales”, or other catch phrases, they still tend to say that we have to create urgency. I find this even among 4-figure commitments. Sure, money back guarantee, but we all know that the same people who have difficulty saying “no” also will have a problem asking for their money back.
Really important point, Seonald.
Love this, Mark – and the community co-creating vibe you’re imbuing this whole topic with. For someone with a core defence of avoiding conflict (as you put it), you’re doing a brave and awesome thing 🙂
I’m looking forward to signing and wearing with pride the final version of this pledge.
The “cooling off” period was the bit which I had questions come up around. I very much encourage “sit with it for a day, look at your finances, talk with your partner” AND I find an early-bird deadline or maximum number limit etc is useful for holding someone true to their desire to change, versus letting the gremlins win and drag them back to “same old”.
So, to respond to Seonaid, I feel a level of urgency can be a service to our potential client, giving them a reason to commit, rather than staying in “one day” territory forever.
I’m thinking: the cooling off allowance is good BEFORE commitment, then once commitment is made, hold them true to that and what was alive for them when they said “Yes!”
In general I like the idea and a grass roots movement with a site and plug in to say coaches are signed up could be a really good thing, if that is (and it’s a big if) we could spread the word enough for people to realize.
At the moment I offer every client the opportunity for a full refunds after the first session (including that session) if they don’t want to continue. In the 5 years since I introduced that I think I have had 3 people take me up on it, but it does give them some peace of mind.
And I also agree with Doug, should we be recommending anybody or any service we wouldn’t use ourselves or send a family member to? If in doubt, shut up would be my motto because your reputation is on the line.
Good points all. I have no idea if it would get that big. And I wasn’t considering it just for the coaching industry, of which I’m really only peripherally a part of, since I haven’t been trained as a coach, but as a spiritual healer.
Oh Mark, thank you for opening this conversation. There’s lots to consider here and your first draft is excellent.
I don’t know if this is too specific to certain types of services or not, but I’m thinking that the first part may need something around helping the client to check their readiness not just to pay, but to get a return on the investment they are making with you.
In early times as a freelancer I had web design projects where I got really excited to help the client with their big idea without really probing that area. e.g. what is your business model? what’s your plan/ability to promote and grow this asset we’re building? It can be as simple as are you really ready to blog or just asking for one because you think you should? etc.
Maybe this concept applies to other kinds of businesses too, I’m not sure.
Tzaddi- It’s a really great question, and I’m wondering how far it reaches into taking too much responsibility, depending on the package. Should every website designer, for instance, need the ability to assess whether someone has a workable business idea?
I’ve taken clients that were on the edge for me- both in terms of what they were trying to accomplish, and in terms of my own experience/skills. They were a reach, and I’d love for folks to feel like they can stretch without being unethical. I also don’t want folks to feel like they have to discern deeply whether the client is making the right decision. What do you think?
Perhaps it does take on too much responsibility… I’ve been known to do that 😀
And stretching is also valuable on both sides of the exchange.
Hmm… maybe the general points of having the “cooling off” period and “supporting them in thinking responsibly” cover it anyway… Thanks for considering it with me.
I used to work in web development (not design), and one of my tensions with my “manager” (that is, the person who interviewed the clients and gathered their requirements) was when I was asked to produce code to solve problems before the problem was adequately defined. I had previously been working in the softer skills, so I was able to say, “Hmm… That’s going to cost this much, and it will take this long, and I’m afraid that you’ll be back for the following revisions after 3 months, and here’s why.”
However, I would not, in general, expect somebody that I hired for coding or design work to be able to give me business advice. I would expect them to tell me whether they were capable of doing the work I needed done, and I would also expect them to be clear if my specifications were inadequate, and that was likely to prolong the development phase, adding cost and time delays. Or giving me the wrong thing in the end. This might fall in the category of Setting Clear Expectations, or being clear about your offer.
(But I see that you have the Startup Super Hero Package for such situations, Tzaddi, which looks brilliant and turnkey, so it looks like you’re covered on that front! Also… Love your design work! And the copy on your site. And Tofino. 🙂 )
Thank you so much, Seonaid! It sounds like you and I would be a good match on a web team if you were still doing development. 🙂
I think the spirit of the pledge is very aligned with how many of us here seek to conduct business, and we hope that others will try to do the same. Would it be okay for me to say that I *endorse* it, but not to “sign” it?
I realize that sounds wishy-washy but there’s an important distinction for me. I get a bit squirmy with this type of declared “collective agreement” in the realm of fr*e market enterprise. It’s related to the reasons I also don’t support OWS (which yes, is for another discussion entirely!).
Here come the rotten tomatoes …
😉
No tomatoes, from here: you make an Excellent point, Karri!
Hi Karri- I’m so curious- what is the difference you see between endorsing and signing? The literal meaning of “endorse” means to write on something, kinda like signing.
And I would challenge you about the free market enterprise/collective agreement. Our society has lots of collective agreements in the marketplace, and they are critical. In fact, the reason this pledge is such a hot topic is because this collective agreement is considered by many of us to be the right thing to do- without this kind of trust in the marketplace already, very much less commerce would be going on.
And, there are all kinds of ethical standards that legislated at a government level, or are held within a pledge or code at an industry level.
Just bringing this up because I don’t get your squirminess about signing on. Not that you should, just wanting to understand.
Hey Mark,
You make a good point. I’ll try to clarify: I support the *spirit* of this discussion, but I feel no need to put my name on a pledge.
To answer your questions:
We certainly do have many collective agreements in place, some are in the form of laws created by a very complex democratic process that involves lawmakers/gov’t. Others are created by institutions, associations, and other bodies of governance across various industries.
Some of those agreements serve a purpose. Many, many do not, except to elevate the status of the people who create and/or enforce them.
There’s a FINE line between protecting the greater public good and living in a free and creative and productive and innovative society. Despite my deep distaste for what’s happening in the coaching/consulting industry, I’m willing to accept that there is a trade-off at play. ie. enjoying true freedom — including in business — means that harm may come our way at times. (Yep, giving away my political stripe here, but I’m willing to take that risk.)
My deep, deep desire is for increased awareness, stronger financial literacy and principled marketing/business practices among entrepreneurs, online and off. I think that is definitely happening here at your blog. I simply don’t believe a pledge is the best instrument for furthering this aim. It might be ideal for others here, just not for me.
For ME, the only pledge that matters is the one I make to myself when working with clients. That pledge is private. It evolves. It listens closely to my conscience. It’s shaped by my head and my heart. And it has served me incredibly well as a human being and as a business owner. I’m not perfect but I have a conscience the size of a small country. For ME, a formal pledge adds complexity where it’s not needed.
I’m also not sure how a pledge digitally signed by a group of people online (and let’s be honest: most of us hardly know one another here) fills a gap or makes doing business any “safer.” Again, we are accountable to ourselves and to our clients. The folks who are doing serious financial harm aren’t going to sign this pledge or anything like it. Even if they did sign it, so what? It’s not possibly indicative of where they are in their own journey of service. Nor can it really be for anyone.
Lawmakers may ultimately have to deal with the big players creating big time financial harm. Unless of course the market punishes them first. I DO believe that this kind of healthy public discourse is a HUGE step toward that end. Not that I want to see anyone suffer or be “punished” necessarily, but you can be sure that “they” are listening to this discussion.
On some level we’ve all done harm in one way or another to someone in our business. None of us are perfect, but there’s certainly an issue of scale here … $50K “generally” is going to be a ton riskier than $500 or even $5000K. Generally.
Globally, democratic societies are learning a gargantuan and painful lesson about money right now. Let’s work *through* that lesson … every ugly nook and cranny. So such a disaster doesn’t happen again. More documents and rules and agreements aren’t going to make any difference. Just ask Obama … he should know.
In this space, in this context, it is my deep, deep belief that the greatest force for change will be that of honest conversation. No lobbying or protesting … or pledging required 😉
For me, “signing” the pledge when it’s in its final version would be like the commitment we enter into in a wedding ceremony: it’s primarily for the person themselves and their beloved (in this case – us and our prospective clients) and there’s added power in being witnessed by a community, who we don’t need to know all that well for it to have impact.
I love that metaphor Corrina!
For me though …my website, my blog, my dialog with folks in the online/offline spaces, and ultimately, my work … all of those things are very public testament to my commitment to principled centered living.
But I don’t necessarily “need” to be even that public about it in order for it to stick… in order for me to be just as committed to working in good faith for my clients. (Though I definitely use contracts when they’re called for.)
I hope that further clarifies where I’m coming from. It’s different for everyone.
To further that metaphor then: some people feel the need to marry with a large group of witnesses present. Many don’t though. It’s only fair to assume that both paths have equally as good a chance at creating a positive outcome 😉
This feels powerful to me and I would/will happily sign. Pace’s addition re: where there’s little to no client interaction and her revised statement around “recommending” both resonated with me as well. Thank you for this!
Let’s be sure we don’t be smug about this sort of thing, though.
Here’s a dark truth. A lot of “heart oriented” people are trying to do what they like and declare that it’s a business. They make nonsense – which they put lots of effort into. They give it away for free and people take it.
When they ask for money – for their paltry value – there are no takers. In lieu of saying “what was wrong with me,” they say “the world is a dark and jerky place.”
To correct this – the first thought is to center on providing value- real value. It’s not to assume we have a particular skill that’s worthwhile.
Hey Chris- I agree with you, although I might word it differently. 🙂 I’m curious how you see this impacting a Do No Financial Harm pledge. Are you thinking a business owner has to take responsibility to deliver something viewed as valuable and useful by… whom?
I think the “smugness” is when our ego is driving the bus, Chris. Speaking for myself it’s when my motivation is to impress people by how “principled” I am or “heart-centered.” I agree, I find unattractive.
What can be tricky is discerning whether it’s my ego or my heart. In my experience though, if a message or action is mostly me articulating what is true in my heart, it’s not smug or self-righteous.
When something is smug, my heart knows right away just as my heart knows when something is coming mostly from the heart. The resonance is there or it isn’t.
Hi Chris,
I’d like to add that a lot of what we supposedly value in our world, that folks get paid a lot to do, isn’t necessarily good for us or the world.
Maybe some of these folks have trouble asking for something that’s actually valuable, we are just not evolved enough to see it yet. The do no harm philosophy would be a breath of moral air for many of the industries that appear to regularly do harm, that not enough people question.
Our economy could use some assistance evolving into something new.
g.
I’ve signed! 🙂
This is lovely. I love the idea of doing no financial harm. I think what is most useful about what your proposing is the level of consciousness (client) and communication (business owner) that precede a purchase.
Here’s what I’d add:
— Tie the cost to actual outcomes
— Allow customers a variety of payment options, not just credit cards
— Under-promise, over-deliver
— Assess the value of the product or service after it’s been consumed
— Make contributions from my profits that support those unable to afford my services (or other charity)
Lastly, I have a semantic issue with the overall concept. If I’m *not* doing financial harm, what am I actually trying to do? Is it to create financial health? Is it to improve consciousness in purchasing? What is the best possible outcome intended — and call it that. You can cease causing financial harm to self or others without actually improving anything.
Thanks for curating a discussion about this, Mark. It’s got my do-good juices flowing! 🙂
Jennifer ~ Your bullet points are all valid, but very specific, thinking rather than feeling, tools for achieving our goal. A potential problem that I see with adding them (or any specific check-off items) *to* the Statement itself (or Pledge, or whatever it’s going to be called) is that they invite us down the slippery slope of ‘micromanagement by the Head’ instead of the Heart. Those and many other options could be offered as a “tool box” of some sort, but not in any way as some kind of ‘requirement’.
Mm… maybe there is a useful distinction between the principles we will all acknowledge and sign up to – like ‘sometimes it is good to decline someone’s money’ and ‘I trust the client to take his/her own decisions about buying’ – and the things we will do to carry them through in practice.
It seems to me people in all lines of work – coaching, healing, teaching, providing a service… – could sign up to the principles, but we might each commit to doing different things. An initial interview for some, pricing by outcomes for others, and so on.
Jen, I love your point that there needs to be a positive outcome – not just a not-doing. Thanks for that, because it’s a big part of what’s missing in this for me!
Hi Jen- thanks for weighing in!
I deliberately avoided a postive-outcome statement as outside the scope of this particular pledge, based on the template of my work as a paramedic. My certification as a paramedic ensured I had the knowledge, training and skill, and my legal duty as a paramedic was to deliver care to those in need. My oath to do no harm was an ethical boundary to make me aware of the limits of my care, and the possibilities inherent in invasive procedures.
Since selling is an invasive procedure 🙂 I was seeing this pledge as something meant to create an ethical boundary strictly in the realm of the sales process. In terms of what you are doing in your business… well, that’s your business, right? I hope you are (I know *you* are) delivering something useful and valuable that is of service to clients/customers.
In terms of the bullet list, I kinda agree with the other comments. How, for instance, would you tie the cost to actual outcomes for an acupuncturist or massage therapist? Although I like them, and we strive to practice all of them, I think the implementation would vary widely depending on the type of business.
Yikes. Selling is an invasive procedure?
I think it can be – AND I think that as consumers, we have a responsibility to ourselves to create boundaries that prevent others’ selling from invading our space in ways that feel wrong to us.
That doesn’t necessarily mean saying “no” to whatever the person doing the selling offers. I’ve bought things from people whose selling tactics weren’t what I would want to employ, because I could see that the item/program/service was something that would get me the results I wanted.
I will admit it took me a long time and a lot of experience to reach a point where I can separate selling tactics from results. And I will also say that I would never purchase something if I felt the selling tactics were invasive enough to be harmful to anyone, because I wouldn’t want to support someone who was operating in that way.
I think what comes to me over and over again in this discussion is how many shades of gray there are in all these situations!
Hey Grace- Selling is probably one of the most invasive procedures in business, if you don’t mind me borrowing medical language. Both you and the potential buyer are coming very deeply and intimately into each other’s space. If it’s done well, it’s welcome and beautiful. If it’s not, it’s painful and horrible.
Okay – I get what you mean now – I was interpreting “invasive” as always negative, but yes; now that you’ve re-defined it for me, I totally get what you mean! thanks. 🙂
Tzaddi wrote:
Speaking of “Principles” I’ve become more fond of “Truths” lately. As in the Declaration of Independence” “We hold these truths to be self-evident.”
For me, “Truth” is a word my heart likes. “Principles” is a head word. If I’m a truly heart-centered business owner my heart through which the Divine speaks runs the show. My head should be taking orders from my heart.
If it’s the other way, I get in trouble.
Peace
Judy
The notion of this badge makes me uncomfortable for several reasons.
The main reason goes back to the saying,
This echoes my own sentiments (I think!) stated earlier/above. Thanks for articulating this, James.
I’m not sure it presumes that at all, James. I’m not really getting a sense of a mob mentality here. There’s some strong emotion at times, but more I get a sense of relief that it’s being discussed openly. Not sure what you’re reading into it.
In my mind a pledge is simply a commitment. Most commitments people make could fairly be described, I believe, as vague or unclear. To take a pledge is to make a specific commitment.
And for each person who signs/commits/pledges, they may or may not choose to make it visible to their clients. And if they do, then it makes the commitment clear to the person involved.
“Ethical” is a broad-ranging term, while this pledge addresses specific issues.
Another way to think about it is as a client education effort. For many clients, they don’t understand or have even thought about what kind of dynamics make a sale unethical. Many would be going on “gut” instinct, a sense that they like or don’t like it. By clearly articulating what is meant by ethical, it helps the client put words and principles to their sense ethics in a sales conversation.
As far as the “secret police” idea- I’m hoping it’s not secretive nor particularly police-like. What it would do is represent an ethical stand in business, which I think is important in any society or culture. All cultures, all societies, have shared beliefs and values or they wouldn’t hold together. We need both a diverse ecosystem of practices and some shared values to have a healthy marketplace full of trust.
I would challenge the relativistic notion of “what one person considers ethical another considers just fine.” I know that people have different emotional reactions at different specific price points, for instance, but the shared value of “…deadlines are set to allow for both a cooling-off period and the ability for the potential client to discuss the purchase with others.” is not a particularly radical ethical stand to take. It doesn’t presume to set prices, but it does account for the acknowledged psychological trick of forcing a decision while in an emotional vulnerable state induced within a very short time frame.
For personal reasons, I’m no longer a fan of the Pledge of Allegiance. However it would be a mistake to remove the words “under God” from the language. The key rights of every citizen outlined in the constitution are inalienable and given to us by God, not the government. Consider this; if your rights are God given, they cannot be taken away by any totalitarian regime. However, people who believe a government is the font of a person’s right to free speech, property, liberty, etc., are generally the first to lose these rights and tell their fellow citizens “It’s for our own good”, and “I feel much safer now”. People need to research why the reference to God was added to the pledge. It helped differentiate us from Godless Communists who believed government, not individual rights, should be the cornerstone of a nation. I’d much rather alienate and irritate a handful of whiny atheists than change the pledge back to the original language.
Couple of points:
1. I don’t like the idea of a badge; for me, it feels too much like ego and marketing, even if it’s well intentioned.
2. What would work better than a badge would be some text, somewhere in the section of one’s website that discusses values/beliefs/”about”, that says something like “And I generally subscribe to the points in the “Financial Do No Harm” declaration (sorry, I’m a lawyer, can’t think of a better word than “declaration” right now) on the Heart of Business website”.
3. Different people are coming to this from different places. For some, this discussion feels vibrant and necessary. For others, it seems redundant or unnecessary. That’s fine. I’ve clicked on some of the links in the posts above, and I find myself feeling more in alignment with the feeling I get with some of the websites than others, so it makes sense to me that some of them feel more excited about the Do No Harm issue than others, just as I feel more excited about the Do No Harm issue than do some of the people who have posted to this blog. There’s lots of room on the Internet for all kinds of folks.
I’ve been mulling this over and here’s what keeps coming up:
1. This topic has clearly touched a nerve for people in this community (in however way you want to define this community)
2. One reason I think it has elicited such strong reactions is there is a yearning to belong to something, an idea, a movement in which we can proudly say, “this is what I stand for and this is the tribe I belong to and I’m proud to hang with these people.”
It wouldn’t be contributing it I didn’t feel this idea of “making a difference” is so vital to my identity as a business owner.
So it makes sense that people are excited about signing the agreement and wearing a badge.
Identity is such a deep, powerful thing because each of us for better or worse defines ourselves by our associations. Few things are more painful than feeling as if we don’t belong.
3. The dark side of belong is that there can be the assumption that “not everybody belongs” and belonging can become elitist and excluding. I think it takes a lot of wisdom to create “membership rules” that are truly loving and inclusive.
The ego LOVES exclusivity. But it is very painful to the heart.
4. Another thing that I know I’m reacting to and I’m seeing others reacting to as well is that there’s all sorts of behavior in the marketplace. We see some business owners saying they want to make a difference and then using strong-arm sales tactics and upselling that feels icky and manipulative.
It feels especially awful for me because I try so hard not to act that way and when I see other people who seem to be doing it not only openly but with relish and wild success there’s a four-year old in me that is jumping up and down saying “No fair, no fair!!”
5. And even when we do our best, we’re still human and imperfect. Have some clients wasted time and money working with me? Absolutely. I don’t think anyone here can honestly say we’ve consistently delivered on our promises 100% of the time. That brings up a lot of squirmy feelings of guilt and shame but there it is.
It’s just part of being a human being. We’re not perfect and our businesses aren’t going to be perfect either.
6. In terms of what would be helpful to me now as a business owner, here are some thoughts:
A. Short list of guidelines or best practices that help me make wiser decisions and take wiser actions.
B. Covers 80% of likely scenarios. The other 20% are grey areas where I handle on a case by case basis.
C. A focus on making a “positive” difference rather than a difference. One of my personal criteria for success is whether a client is truly better off for having worked with me? AND have they made demonstrably progress towards their heart’s desire?
D. My client feels at a gut level that yes working with me has helped them and that they’ve gotten more than their money’s worth. That’s a funky thing to try to measure.
I just know I don’t just want my clients to leave with only warm fuzzy feeling. If I’m not helping them do things in a sustainably better way, I personally don’t feel I’ve earned my money.
E. Test the pledge to see if it really helps me make wiser decisions. One of the reasons I don’t want to sign is because I feel I’m already doing most of it. But I’m willing to put it to the test to find out.
For me the bottom line is let’s move beyond words and put this pledge into action. Really work it within the context of your own business and see how well it helps you and your clients.
Nothing will make a bigger positive difference than when our actions reflect our values and principles.
Lets see what happens.
Peace,
Judy
I took part in an explicitly “No Financial Harm” conversation this morning – from the client side! It was interesting, to say the least. And enlightening. And very well-done.
I’ve never seen L comment here, but she has a thorough grasp of the concepts addressed in these posts.
That 10 minutes (maybe) of talking “made me” triple check that I was A) committing the money with my eyes wide open; B) willing to tell the Truth, out loud, about my finances; and C) not looking for a Magic Wand to make it all better, particularly since I don’t quite fit her usual demographic.
I’m grateful that we had that talk, because now that I’ve done that ^^^ triple check, I am also taking other appropriate actions to change my Money Reality.
Blessings to you all, for putting the energy of this idea into the Cosmos where it will continue to spread!