Let me tell you the story of a hard-working business owner, who slowly wore himself and his business down to dust, and how he turned it around again.
For those of you with a lot on your plates, I’ll tell it to you quick:
Once upon a time, empty actions = empty results.
Then, (dah-dah-dah-daaaaaah!) The Remembrance.
Suddenly, full actions = full results.
And they lived happily ever after.
The story is the same for nearly all of my clients and class participants. It’s my story, too, and I’m guessing it’s also your story.
But, let me make it useful for you, and fill in a few details.
Part One, The Struggle: Empty actions = empty results.
You have to understand how marketing works, how to deal with your money, how to build a business.
However, the world is full of people who have the know-how, and still struggle. I’ve helped some very talented people, who had studied with the best, and yet their business was still struggling, all because of empty actions.
Empty actions are ones you do out of a feeling that you don’t have what you need. “I need more security so I work harder.” “I need more approval so I take more care with things.” I have noticed that in 100% of these cases, it simply doesn’t work. Either the results don’t happen, or if they do happen, it still doesn’t feel like enough.
For most of us, the natural thing to do is to work harder and harder, and try to learn more and more. Guess what? Doesn’t work, and, you are more tired and broke than you were before. Miserable.
Part Two: The Remembrance.
I had a participant in one of my Focus on Marketing classes ask me, “Why are we spending the entire first class on the Remembrance and the Unveiling Your Jewel™ exercise? I want to get on to the marketing!”
(Both The Remembrance and the Unveiling Your Jewel exercise are explained fully in the free workbook you get when you subscribe to my ezine. Please read it. If you still need it, there are links at the end.)
Fair enough question. So I told her. Empty actions = empty results. With needs, there is a very subtle distinction to make. There is the physical need- money, food, shelter, companionship. And then there is the Quality of the need: security, safety, love, appreciation, compassion.
You do have physical needs. But often the physical needs, and the Quality of the needs get entangled. After you have the minimum you need, it’s an illusion that more money will increase your feeling of security or safety. Once you no longer live on a mountaintop and there are people around you, more people isn’t going to increase your feeling of love. No matter how many clients you have, they aren’t going to increase your feeling of appreciation.
These Qualities, as the Sufis call them, because they are essential Qualities of the Divine, can not be gained through physical objects or actions. They can only be gained through the heart.
This is why the Remembrance is so important, because it helps your heart to acknowledge the Qualities it needs, and helps your heart to drink and quench its thirst. Safety- Ahhhh, how much more freshing than just making more money!
But I do need money, you say. True, so we don’t just stop with the good feeling. We move on to Part Three.
Part Three: Full Actions = Full Results. Happily Ever After (or, more accurately “Rinse and Repeat.”)
Once you have the fullness of Safety, or Love, or Appreciation in your heart you are ready to act. But now, your actions won’t be attempts to create the feeling of love or safety. No way.
Now your actions are EXPRESSIONS of, say, Safety. If your action is an expression of Safety, instead of trying to create it- guess what? Your results will be an expression of Safety.
Full Action = Full Result.
Think about it. If you are feeling desperate, unsafe, scared, anxious, how efficient are you? How effective are your sales conversations? How compelling is your marketing copy when you write it while anxious? How accurate is your bookkeeping when you are in a panic?
Empty Actions = Empty Results.
Now, if you are feeling cared-for, loved, safe, your heart feels full, it’s different. Your sales conversations are unattached and effective. Your marketing copy flows out feeling generous. You float through your to-do list, even when there is a lot to do.
The hardest part is stopping the cycle of emptiness in Part One, and moving yourself into the Remembrance of Part Two. Once you move into Part Two, Part Three is automatic.
Practical steps: Keys to “Creating Full Results.”
• The easiest place to start is with the practical. If your marketing isn’t working, make sure you understand successful marketing. If you don’t know about business structures, learn about business structures. Get the information first.
Check out my online bookstore, resources and links page, and article archives for information: Click here (opens new window).
• Already spent weeks, months, years getting information, but still have empty results? Then STOP. Stop. Just stop.
As a paramedic, I often saw the results of people who couldn’t stop. They couldn’t stop their car in time. They couldn’t stop using heroin or drinking alcohol. They couldn’t stop. The result: tragedy.
I don’t mean to make this a meladrama. But, if you are racing pell-mell in your business, and you’re not getting there, stop. It will take all of your will power to stop working yourself to exhaustion. Or to stop drifting aimlessly into nonessential, non productive tasks. Your emptiness is driving you. Stop.
• It’s okay to be empty. Your panic, your anxiety, your fear, whatever you feel, is just a reaction to the story you have that being empty isn’t okay. “If this person doesn’t approve of me by buying what I’m selling, then I’m doomed.” Not a healthy story. Instead, allow yourself to feel: “I’m feeling empty of approval- thirsty for approval. I feel empty.”
What does empty feel like?
• Once you stop and feel the emptiness, practice the Remembrance as described in the workbook (link below if you need it.) I also heartily recommend the Remembrance Challenge- 15 minutes a day for two weeks and you win the challenge, and a free workbook. Click here to take the Challenge.
It’s surprising where you can go and how quickly when you have a full tank of gas. Let me know where you end up.
