One of my clients asked me a question about hope, because I was going on and on about it… 🙂 He mentioned that there is a teaching about hope that links it to attachment and thus suffering.
Sufism has a different perspective, and it has to do with a different understanding about hope – and that there are two kinds of hope we’re discussing.
This is really relevant to how you approach this year, and is directly about what my Sufi sheikh called “medicine for the heart” so let me dig in.
The Two Kinds of Hope
One kind of hope is an escapist fantasy hope. This is where you dream that in the next 12 months somehow, inexplicably, miraculously, your business will be doing 3-5 times more revenue than it’s doing now, without any bumps. It will as if you’ve been transported to an entirely different reality.
While this does happen to some people (as I write this, the Powerball lottery jackpot is something north of $950 million), in this I agree with my client and his sources: don’t attach to this kind of hope.
However, there is a more grounded hope that is available. The simple cherishing of yearnings that things can improve, they can get better, in real, measurable ways.
To not embrace this kind of hope is to perhaps risk indulging in despair, or at least feeling stuck in the feeling that nothing can ever change.
Not true. It’s just false.
Asking versus accepting
Related to this is the question as to whether you should ask for what you want, or whether you should surrender and accept what you’re given. There are solid cases to be made, spiritually, for both.
Here’s the kicker: both are true, at different times and in different ways.
I’ve learned through Sufism about what is described as the 28 Stations of the Way, where different heart-stations are described in terms of your progress. In some stations the medicine is to be humble and silent, just accepting everything that comes to you.
In other stations you are supposed to ask for what you want and need.
No station is permanent, you move through them. What is the perfect medicine in one station is what will stop you in your tracks in another. You need to be alive to what’s true and real in your heart.
Given this, I want to encourage you, if you feel open to it, to ask for what you want in your business, to cherish your hopes.
What to do
Take some time in your heart to name 2, or 3 or 5 hopes that you have for your business this year. Make sure you are really connected and grounded in your heart and body, because we’re not looking for escapist fantasies. These are hopes that may be a stretch, may be slightly unreasonable (or totally reasonable), but you can -feel- them in your guts, in your bones, in your heart.
What’s more, is to let your hopes be concrete. If you’ve ever worked with us on our Heart-Centered Goal Planning, then you might know we’re big fans of connecting with qualities like Love, or Generosity, as an anchor for goals, and not being as attached to physical outcomes. Physical outcomes are important, but by fixating on outcomes you can get caught in your ego’s will battling reality. Not so surrendered or nourishing.
Here I’m talking about something else. Because it’s a hope, and not a goal or a strategic project, I want to say that it’s useful to think concretely. You can hope for 30% more income, or a significant increase in your client base, or to finally have a website that you love up and running.
So connect with your heart and name your 2 or 5 hopes. Write them down. Put them somewhere.
Then, schedule 15-20 minute dates in your calendar on a quarterly basis to review them. Not to workshop or process them. Just to reconnect to the hopes you cherish.
With hopes cherished and recorded, ahhh… such a more nourishing way to move into action.
What hopes are you cherishing? I’m going to share the hopes I’m cherishing in the blog comments, I hope you’ll share yours, too.
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Do you cherish hopes about your finances this year?
Hopes for a change in financial circumstances can easily turn to despair because so many people have had their financial situation remain roughly the same for long periods, sometimes years. Sometimes generations.
I want to give you the support and tools to understand and heal your finances, and to being able to nurture realistic hopes for changes that you can see and feel this next year. Our best way of doing that is through the Heart of Money.
So, I hope you’ll join me, and over 500 other people, for the Heart of Money Transformational Journey starting in less than a week.
The best part? The pricing is Pay From The Heart – meaning you set your own price. Please join us!
Click here to find out more, and to register: The Heart of Money Transformational Journey
17 Responses
A very sweet way to think about goals in a softer way. Thank you. I’m going to spend a few minutes this morning asking my heart for its hopes for this year.
Morella- I’m so glad this was helpful. I’ve been watching the changes you’ve been making in your business, and I’m cherishing hopes for you in the coming year. Go Morella!
Mark,
Such an inspiring article!
Despair / feeling nothing can ever change is just as false as escapist fantasy!
Thank you,
-Diana
Diana- glad you found it so inspiring! Woo-hoo!
In reading this post, I was struck by the stark contrast between where I was a few months ago, when a lapse of hope left me in despair…and where I am now, with an abundance of (accessible) hope for my business. Hope truly is the defining difference.
For the new year, I’m cherishing and recording the following hopes for Alchemist Eating:
1. Reach capacity, on a consistent basis, with my intensive 30-day eating package (now limited to 10 new enrollments each month, ensuring high-level care for anyone joining this intensive coaching & support program).
2. Double enrollment in my longer-term, foundational level Holistic Concierge package.
3. Hold three local, in-person workshops or talks in our new community.
4. Double my current newsletter subscriptions.
Thank you for this wonderful exercise…and for helping me reach this new place of hope. Heart of Business continues to be such a blessing and gift to me and my business!
Dana- I, too, am struck by the shift. Yay for hopes! I can cherish those hopes with you. Woo-hoo!
This is beautiful, Mark!
Thank you.
What hopes do I cherish for my business, for this year…
The first thing that comes up, is the despair I often feel!
This is a good first step…
thank you.
Rosa- I so hear you… I send blessings for a shifting out of despair and into the possibilities this year holds for you.
Thank you so much for this. I love the idea that there are different “stations” and that how you respond to your life at each station may be different – accepting vs. asking. I couldn’t agree more; I find that there have been “waiting” stages in my life and then more outward, “go-get-’em” stages, and although I may not always understand why, going with my gut has enabled me to know which stage is which. This is a lovely reflection on that concept.
Michelle- you seem to be touring through my blog today- thank you! Wonderful to hear the resonance, and that you’ve already been practicing this. Grateful.
Hi Mark – love this! Thank you. It expands on my thoughts about hope being a state that is ever present. That hope is not something with a specific end goal, but a place from which we can act with heart toward anything.
Blessings,
Nicole
Nicole- Yes! I love that insight. 🙂
Hi Mark, I have signed up to your Heart of Money course and look forward to healing my issues around asking for a good fee in return for my image consultancy work. I am just starting out and do not yet have a website. That is one of the 5 things I hope for very soon!
Reading this post has reminded me that there is always hope and nothing is surer than change – we can always change our mindset and let the gentleness of hope show us our path.
Many thanks,
Caitriana
Caitriana- I’m so honored to have you along for the Journey, and congratulations on just starting out! Be kind to yourself, there are so many pieces involved in getting a business going. And, here’s to hopes cherished!
Please note that I do not have a website yet.
Thanks so much for this article, Mark… so helpful! I love the idea of the stations, and the two kinds of hope. This all resonates very strongly with me.
This year my hopes are to:
-actually get my business started and flowing. I’ve been working in the beginning stages for so-o-o long.
-feel a sense of confidence, flow and Divine inspiration about it.
-make 50% more income than I’ve been making at my part-time job. This may sound like a lot but it’s not…
I’m really looking forward to the money course. I think it’ll really be helpful.
Thanks again, and blessings to you!
Susan
Susan- so glad it was helpful for you- and here’s to started and flowing! I can cherish all of those hopes with you.