You have goals in your business, I’m sure. Whether it’s about getting more clients, raising your income, or completing a product, you’re trying to get something done, usually by a deadline. (When’s the mortgage due?)
And yet, in going for a goal, you might sometimes begin to feel… twisted, or off–balance. Out of alignment with yourself, somehow.
I had a business coach some years ago that told me: “Mark, whenever you start talking numbers, you get… I don’t know how to say it… linear, and you seem out of yourself.”
She was right. And whenever I feel like that, I can pretty much guarantee I’ll miss the goal. Sound familiar?
And yet, to reach a goal, you can’t just sit back and stand still, can you?
Well, no. You have to go into action.
First you aim, and then you lunge.
I was at my fencing club, helping to teach a new fencer the sport. “Okay, try the lunge.” So he threw himself and the sword forward, totally missing my outstretched palm that was the target.
“Now, try aiming first, and then lunging.” I had him extend the sword in a straight line, before snapping his back leg forward. This time, he hit the target. But…
His knees hurt. He aimed. He lunged. But, he wasn’t really in himself physically, and his knees were out of alignment.
A lot of goal planning approaches tell you to pick measurable goals, and then go for them. You may or may not hit them, but I can guarantee that if you aren’t in alignment with yourself, you’ll hurt your business knees, too, perhaps badly.
What’s your relationship to your goal?
When you set a goal, “I want to be bringing in a steady $3000 per month.” or “I want 15 regular clients” then, because it’s a potential concrete reality, your mind does one of two things (or both). It either starts trying to figure out how to make it happen, or it starts worrying that it’s impossible.
Either way, you’re not in your heart, and you’re going to be out of alignment, and potentially risking your knees. To avoid this, you need to know a crucial distinction.
The difference between a goal and a Goal Area.
There is a crucial distinction that will help keep your business knees healthy, and that’s understanding what a Goal Area is.
A goal is “I want to be making a steady $3000 per month in my business.” But, the Goal Area is “Income.”
A goal is “I want 15 regular clients.” But, the Goal Area is “Clients.”
When you drop the concrete goal, and look at the Goal Area, you have the possibility of accessing the truth. Instead of worrying about whether you can make a gazillion bucks a month, you can begin to see what your relationship to Income is.
Why is that important?
The goal comes out of the relationship.
Results in the physical world are simply expressions of relationships. When you tell your spouse, “Hey, can I give you a neck massage?” That’s an expression of the deeper love and caring you have between you.
Try that neck massage line on a stranger, where the relationship doesn’t exist, and see how far you get…
Before you go for a goal, you need to come into right relationship with the associated Goal Area. And suddenly, things become a lot easier, and you don’t injure your knees. Ready to do that?
Keys to Saving Your Knees
• For any goal you’re struggling with, identify the Goal Area.
Don’t get too hung up on this, because often goals will touch several Goal Areas, and vice versa. For instance, A goal of 15 clients may touch Goal Areas of Clients, Income, and Marketing.
Let your heart tell you which one has the most juice for you in the moment. And, often, the wording of the goal will give you the clue. You could have phrased the goal: “Marketing to bring in 15 clients” and then I would have leaned in the direction of the Goal Area of Marketing.
• Once you have the Goal Area, how are you two doing?
Take some time in your heart to look at the Goal Area and admit the truth of your relationship. Of course it’s going to be at least a little bit of a mess, because you’re struggling with it. That’s okay.
You want the relationship. For instance, a client said: “My relationship with income is zilch.” But, that’s not the relationship- that’s been the results. The relationship has to do with emotions. “Oh, in that case my relationship is fearful, anxious, tired, and angry.”
• What do you two need to get along better?
Begin to ask in your heart, what does your heart need to be in better relationship with the Goal Area? Stay away from physical things like, “Well, I need more income!”
Instead, focus on what are called in Sufism essential qualities. Things like Forgiveness. Love. Strength. Wisdom. Compassion. Truth. Acceptance. Appreciation.
When you get an answer, trust it, and let your heart ask for those, and receive them. How does your heart feel?
• Now, go back to the goal.
With your heart more connected, ask: “What results would naturally come out of this new, healthier relationship?” You may notice that the results you say are different than the goals you had originally set.
That’s okay. We’re looking for grounded, in-the-body feeling for your goals. If the goal is more modest than the original one- that’s okay. Go for it, because once you get there, you don’t have to stop.
Goal setting is an important part of developing your business. But, do it from a place of right relationship, and you’ll find that your business stands stronger and healthier, and at the same time you actually start hitting your goals.
