I found myself looking more closely at some of the individual clients I’ve worked with lately. Why do I choose in some sessions to focus almost entirely on action steps, and in other sessions we spend time mostly looking at emotional and spiritual issues?
I find that both types of sessions are incredibly important in moving people forward, and yet if it’s the wrong mode for what’s needed it won’t help you at all. You have to learn how to know which mode you need: internal processing or external action.
The hazards of a wrong choice? If you choose action when you need internal heart-time, you are liable to spend a whole lot of time doing a whole lot of stuff, and not making any real progress. Even if you achieve things, you still carry an “off” feeling in yourself that keeps you from enjoying life.
Example: a client whose business was struggling no matter how hard she worked on marketing- no calls back, not much in the pipeline. When we took time to clear some internal fears about survival, suddenly an avalanche of business came in, without effort.
However, I’ve seen the opposite be just as true, where spending enormous amounts of time processing fears and internal blocks, leaves you sitting there, with no movement whatsoever.
Example: a client who had done a tremendous amount of healing work on herself- she had healed from some very debilitating physical conditions. Yet, no matter how hard she worked on her fears, her business remained stagnant and she remained exhausted. Here, the addition of some marketing wisdom, and clear steps helped her create a flier for her first workshop ever- a workshop where she had over 20 people, and subsequent invitations from different parts of the country to go teach.
So, it seems clear that you need both the action steps, and the internal clearing and healing in order to be successful. The big trick is knowing which to do and when.
I’ll give you the biggest, most obvious hint on how to know: if you are stuck, whatever mode you are in- try the other mode. If you’ve been working like a dog but not getting anywhere, it’s time to take a Remembrance break and see what’s really going on in your heart. Chances are, the actions are covering up uncomfortable emotions.
If you’ve been doing a lot of healing/emotional work on your “issues” and you still feel stuck and frustrated- stop! Get out! Go take a walk in the woods. Or call a business contact and be willing to just make a mess of it. Break your stagnation by seeing something happen.
This is just the most obvious choice. I’ve given you some more specific hints below.
Keys to The Balancing Act
• Action can be divided into three different types of activities- On, In, and Out. See if you need to work “on your business,” meaning doing your marketing or accounting or strategic planning. Or “in your business,” which means showing up for clients and customers- maybe you need to go the extra mile in whatever you are providing.
Or maybe you need to work “out of your business.” Maybe you need to go take a walk in the woods, or take yourself out for an ice cream, or spend some quality time with your garden, or a friend. Sometimes the nourishment your business needs is that it needs YOU to be nourished by what you love.
• Similarly, internal time can be divided into three different types- walking, drinking, and learning.
Walking is when you are “walking with your issues.” You are sitting down, maybe with the help of a friend, coach, healer, or therapist, to really face your fear, or anger, or frustration, and really learn what it’s about.
“Drinking” is a term Sufis use for time in Remembrance when you are just enjoying the connection in your heart. Sometimes during Remembrance I can feel an incredible love and strength in my being, and I just drink that in, without having to work any issues.
“Learning” is almost an activity, but sometimes it’s necessary to read and study some of the spiritual truths in this world- the ancient wisdom of different spiritual paths often brings clarity to every day issues we confront. My past ezine article, “The Confidence Game,” is from an ancient Sufi teaching on excellence.
I would love to hear stories from you about how you deal with The Balancing Act. If you are inspired, send ’em on in. If I get enough inspiring ones, I’ll share them, with your permission, for everyone’s benefit.
