When Business Gets in the Way of Doing What You Love

As Heart of Business has grown the last two, really three, years, I’ve been in an intensive learning curve transitioning from DIY solo practitioner to leader of a company. It’s been bumpy and incredibly gratifying.

A penny dropped recently, despite having heard it in different forms over and over again. The penny that dropped clarified that you don’t just do things differently when you head-up a team of people, but you actually do different things. As in, my day is filled with very different activities than the ones on my calendar 24 months ago.

For me, it’s been a struggle to change my daily activities. It’s not just about getting it done or being afraid to let other people help. That was definitely a hurdle, and I got through it by practicing. It’s been something deeper.

There’s an ongoing belief in me that “front line” work is what’s valuable. Doing the coding changes on the website, getting the promotional email written, writing the content, answering the query from a client, teaching the course.

So, when my weekly calendar is full of meetings with HoB team members, or I’m needing to spend several hours just sitting and thinking about the business, it’s really hard for me to value that as important.

Kate pointed it out to me multiple times until I finally began to grok it. “Mark, there’s a tone of impatience that comes into your voice when we’re meeting, as if this isn’t really important and you can’t wait to get on to the next thing.”

It took many repetitions, but it finally stopped me in my tracks when I got it.

Got What?

You may just be in the place of getting your DIY solo practice started. You may never want to turn it into a company, which is just fine. And so you may be wondering how in the heck does this apply to you?

This is actually a critical, internal shift. Many people talk about the critical shift from “practitioner” or “expert” or “engineer” to “business owner.” And yes, that’s a critical shift, when you realize that you actually have a business, and that you are the sovereign of it.

But that’s not the shift I’m talking about.

It’s A Shift of Caring

There’s a very technical, very global-corporation-oriented book, The Leadership Pipeline, whose authors talk about the real nitty-gritty of what leaders and managers at different levels of an organization need in order to be effective.

The authors are talking about a shift in what activities you care about and see as valuable and worthwhile. Really getting it in your kishke, your guts, the value of these different activities, so your calendar fills with different activities.

The funny thing is, in this very corporate technical leadership book, what they are really talking about is a big expansion in empathy, humility, and caring.

This can be a tough one for many solo business owners. Often a practitioner is really in love with his client work, and wants to do that to the exclusion of all else. So things like marketing, systems, accounting, sales, content creation all fall into the “I know I need to, but they aren’t truly the real thing” category.

If you can find a job in an organization that will pay you to do that one thing that you love, and that feels right to you, fantastic! Go for it. If that’s not an option, you need to expand the reach of your heart in order to be an effective business owner, one whose business can bring in clients and money.

You need to find room in your heart for the business stuff, to tuck it in right next to what you already love doing.

Two Different Loves

First there is the impersonal, almost abstract love. You know, someone is rude to you at the store, you react to them. And then later, once you catch your breath, you realize they are human, they have a heart, and they probably were just stuck in a pattern. If you take the time you can probably touch into a universal love for them, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to hang out together.

Then, there’s the more intimate, personal, connected love. The one where you actually are interested in this person. You want to hang out, get in their space, and learn more about who they are and what makes them tick. The love carries you forward.

If you find the most you can access is the first kind of love for the different areas of your business that need attention, you probably are in for a rough time. I don’t mean to burst anyone’s bubble, but your new business needs a very personal and intimate love and caring if it’s going to really do well.

Getting Past Prejudices

Human beings like categories, especially in a crowded community. I personally live in an urban area with a million and half people, so if I meet someone who isn’t going to be a friend, it’s easier to unconsciously slot them into a category than to take the time to get to know them personally. Painful, but it’s something our brains do automatically, unless we bring a conscious presence to being aware of the people we meet.

Meet enough people in a certain category that you don’t like and it becomes much harder to really see a shining gem of a person in that category. The prejudice of previous experience gets in the way.

In last week’s article I spoke about the cycle of violence in business. In it I discuss the painful and damaging history that business has had over the last few centuries. By the time we’re adults in this society, we’ve met many, many examples of business practices we would never want to associate with, much less be caught in a dark alley at midnight with them.

Your business is not that business. Your business is a shining gem of a business—or at least it can be. Your business is aching to be seen as the worthy partner of the beautiful work you already do for clients.

If you could only see the beauty in your business, the potential beauty in your business’ marketing, accounting, and other aspects, what would be possible?

It’s been startling for me. In taking time and really caring about all of the things Heart of Business now needs from me, things like meetings with team members, clear vision and communication, allowing others to do the work and learning how to give feedback that truly supports them and helps them to grow… when I touch into the beauty in these things, my eyes blur with tears.

Like I said earlier, turning your solo practice into a company may not be on your path—it certainly doesn’t have to be. You can be perfectly financially viable and successful without a big team.

Yet still, if you want to be financially viable and successful, you need to see your business as the beautiful individual it is. You have to find the room in your heart to love your business as much as you love what you do. To see the transformational possibilities in what it can do.

I’ve written a lot about how marketing can be healing, about the creativity and heart in systems, and how business itself can be healing.

Now It’s Up to You

There’s a lot of nitty-gritty stuff to get done. Before you tackle your business to-do list with a sense of exhaustion, overwhelm and resentment, wondering when you get to do “the good stuff,” stop. Take some time.

Set aside, for a moment, the love you have for the work you do, and like with a forgotten younger child, turn to your business and all the things it needs you to show up for and see if you can find the love in your heart to be with it. The love that allows you to get more intimate and personal with it. The love that brings an appreciation and a desire to learn about what it truly needs and how it wants to express itself.

And then get to work with love in your heart.