It happens all the time. Someone says, yes, they want to work with you, and then, somehow, it doesn’t happen. Their payment never arrives, things seem to get strange, or sticky, or complicated. And it just never happens.
Even after you’ve made a great heart connection and there’s been some real trust built, they still ding and ditch, say yes and poof into thin air.
What’s up with that?
Stage Diving Into Your Business
I spent my teen years in the punk rock scene. You know, ripped clothing, funny haircuts, loud and angry music. Stage diving.
Stage diving is an awesome twist on the whole “fall and catch me” trust exercise. You climb up onto the stage with the band, usually three to five feet above the floor. Then you dive out into the crowd. And they catch you.
And they always do. In years of going to punk rock shows, I only ever saw one person kinda hit the floor, and he was too big, too drunk, and there weren’t that many people in the crowd. People still broke his fall.
When someone says yes, that’s what they are doing—they’ve climbed up onto the stage and are ready to dive into your business.
How’s your dance floor lookin’?
Quick Switch of Musical Genre: Frank Sinatra
Frankie was a crooner, and his well-deserved reputation for heart-felt singing came from a little-known secret: he practiced. A lot. I read in a biography of his that he would practice each song up to one thousand times before singing it on stage.
Why so many times? You’d figure a few dozen times would be enough, eh?
After singing it so many times, Ol’ Blue Eyes knew each note in the song the way most singers knew the entire song. There was such a deep familiarity with the details of the song, that he could forget about the song.
And just sing.
What Happens After the “Yes?”
What does happen after someone tells you Yes? Do you know? Are you clear? Because if you’re not, that may be why they aren’t jumping in.
It can be an awkward moment with your new potential client. You’ve been in beautiful connection up until this point, the heart energy is flowing, there’s a lot of inspiration about what’s possible.
And then *ding,* you switch to things like contracts, payments, agreements, scheduling. What a speed bump! Painful.
Do what Frankie did and your clients will stage dive with you. How’s that for a mixed metaphor? At least it was all music.
The Details
Because money, payment and commitments are such uncomfortable topics for so many people, it can be easy for a business owner to pay them scant attention. When it comes to that point in the conversation, that discomfort and lack of familiarity with the details of their own sales process surfaces.
Some years ago I was going to hire someone for help with my business. It was a $1500 service, and I was happy to pay it. I said, “Yes.” Then he was slow getting back to me. And then the details shifted. And then… and then…
Enough shifted and changed that suddenly the stage was looking an awfully long way from the floor, and no one seemed to be there to catch me. I wasn’t going to jump.
Another time we were hiring an electrician to upgrade some of our home’s wiring. You know, the wiring that was installed in 1930 and wasn’t really up to snuff for a wired-up home office. Yeah, that wiring.
When it came time for the estimate, he went on and on and on talking about every little detail. Totally overwhelmed us and our eyes glazed over. Thankfully, I got that he was just unskillful with the sales process, but still seemed like an uber-competent electrician. We gave him the benefit of the doubt and had him do the work. He was fantastic.
But you’d never know that from how he handled the conversation. If he had been as sloppy with his electrical work as he was with how he handled his explanations, we would’ve been living in Not Good Land.
Painful.
Write Your Song
It’s time for you to sit down and really think through what happens after someone says “Yes!” What steps have to happen? What do they need to know? How does your business catch them once they jump?
There’s a lot more to this than you might think. Do you need emergency contact info? How do they schedule with you? Is there a cancellation policy? What if they are unhappy? What do they get and when?
You want to spell it all out. Right now, take a few minutes and brain-heart-storm it all out onto paper.
Then begin to think about delivery. What do you need to tell them right then, after they say yes. What do you say first? What do you say next? And what of it all gets delivered in written format? When do they need to get the information back to you. How long do they have to complete the payment?
Take a few more minutes and contemplate your list. What gets delivered when? And how? What can wait, and what do they need to know immediately?
Now Practice
Once you get it all sketched out, go over it. Practice saying it in the mirror, even. “Great! I’m glad you want to jump in. Okay, first we need to schedule your first appointment, and then we handle payment within the next 24 hours. We can do that right now if you want. And third I have a packet of information that I need you to read, sign and get back to me so we’re clear on how this all works.”
It’s going to sound funny. It’s going to be strange and weird. It’s going to come out of your mouth as inauthentic and disconnected.
That’s okay. It’s just the first time. Practice it multiple times. Get really clear about what you need to say.
After all, that’s what you’ve done with everything else. You’re really comfortable talking about the issues your business addresses because you’ve spoken about them and worked with them so much. Months and years, maybe decades.
Meanwhile you’ve practiced speaking the details of your business arrangement with a new client…how many times? And how many times after gaining some clarity?
It’s okay. Be strange, at home, alone. You don’t even need a mirror. Just get clear enough on your details to not have to think about them.
Now Sing Like Sinatra
The end result is you’ll be able to maintain your deep heart connection through the “Yes” and into the details of the agreement, without getting distracted by your own lack of preparation. This means that your new client experiences no bumps or drops after “Yes.”
And isn’t that really what it’s all about: a seamless flow of love from potential into relationship?
p.s. We’ll help you sing like a punk-rock Sinatra March 25-26 in Portland.
The Sacred Moment Seminar is a two-day event blending the practical
nitty-gritty with the heart and healing of sales conversations. It’s beautiful. It’s profound. It’s effective at helping you make and maintain the heart connection with potential new clients.
And it’s more than 2/3 full with an early-bird deadline coming up March 5. We’re having a no-cost call on the Sacred Moment, March 3. You can register here.
I hope you can join us.
p.p.s. Need some hands-on help, like, now?
We have two official Heart of Business practitioners ready to roll up their sleeves and help you with your business. Check out the Organic Business Development Program and see if Jason or Judy resonates more strongly with you.
30 Responses
“A seamless flow of love” – no other business mentor I’ve come across uses phases like this and this is why I love ya, Mark 🙂
I am gutted I’m not in Portland to attend live. I have the home-study Sacred Moment pack which is great so will carry along with that and look forward to you blessing us in England with your in-person work.
Have a great time those who attend live – it really is a marvellous process.
With gratitude
Corrina
.-= Corrina Gordon-Barnes’s lastest post: You Can
But, Corrina, don’t you think late March is a perfect reason to finally visit Portland? 🙂 Oh, yeah, I know… we’ll make it to the UK eventually… sooner than later, I hope!
Wow — I have been wondering about this topic for ages, and you’ve created the perfect metaphor. This is definitely an area I need to work on.
Thanks as always!
.-= Kelly Watson’s lastest post: What Godzilla Can Teach You About Good Marketing =-.
Sweet! Glad it was helpful, Kelly.
My goodness, a “punk-rock Frank Sinatra”
That’s quite an image!
Joe Strummer, perhaps?
Listen, I love Joe. But he was no Frankie. 🙂
Hey Mark!
Feeling a flow of appreciation for your always-present, yet-deepening abilty to marry spirituality and energy with money and business — and to so easefully articulate the beauty of nuances in that web. I feel my shoulders drop and I relax into more possibility. Today’s article was another especially-great one! Yum! Sending lots of love your way…
-Claire
Thanks, Claire- I’m so grateful it landed for you. And what yummy words to take in.
Mark,
What an absolutely perfect blog post and The Sacred Moment Seminar? Amazing, extremely useful content.
I think that creative professionals may have even more difficulty with this issue. We are in the professional that we are because we love the process: helping people discover their passions and strengths, crafting the perfect messages for them, developing the website that says who they truly are.
It does seem to be abrupt moving to the mundane stuff: what kind of money I need from you to start the project, what do you do next, what do I do next, how does this all work.
But we still want that heart connection. We crave it.
I know that many people will benefit greatly from your seminar. Thanks for doing all that you do.
.-= Judy Dunn’s lastest post: Unintentional Marketing: Are We Making Our Customers Feel Stupid? =-.
Hey Judy- thanks for that. I’ll tell you, these teachings, when I discovered them, were life-changing for me. I’m glad they are landing so well with others.
Hi Mark,
I love this topic. Look forward to your unique take on it.
Selling/sharing/serving is complex. I’ve had clients say yes and carry through with with their yeses. Other times, I’ve had clients say yes and present various reasons why they can no longer say yes a few days later.
I try not to take it personally and continue to stay in contact with the yes then no folks because we can all get scared to take that leap.
Here take my hand … I’ll help you over the bridge to the land of new.
Thx! Giulietta, Inspirational Rebel
.-= Giulietta the Muse’s lastest post: How do you define rich? =-.
It can be so confusing, can’t it? Why can’t a yes just be a yes! Sometimes I get whiny when I forget about the love…
Mark,
The way you explain this is genius. I find my photography coaching clients in this same position (as can be said for any business) and the big question mark over their heads as to what went wrong.
As I read this post, (as a photographer) I could see step-by-step how I walk my photography clients through the process of what will happen without overwhelming them with technical information or things that only I need to know and worry about.
I did not realize that I “prepared my dance floor”, but I can see clearly how that process has worked for me and what improvements I can make to close even more sales.
This analogy will help me explain yet another part of the process and system where photographers should be working hard on.
Thank you.
This is sheer brilliance – no kidding.
Simple, succinct and easy to implement.
Sweet! 1) I’m so glad you’re already doing it and 2) I’m glad this brought it to consciousness so you can teach more people. I really want everyone to get it.
Hi Mark, This is great information and something I didn’t even realize was missing in my business. Sometimes I walk away from a meeting with a new client feeling like I’ve completely overwhelmed them with info and since we don’t get paid upfront in my industry, I never know for sure if there is real commitment.
Creating a “where to we go from here” piece just went on my to do list.
Thanks! I hope to get to one of your workshops sometime.
So glad this helped! I bet that’s really frustrating to not get paid at least a deposit upfront, so you don’t know about the commitment.
I hope you can join me for a seminar some time.
Great stuff here Mark.
The way you presented it is clear, helpful and really accessible.
Which is awesome. And much appreciated.
Thank you.
(And is it ok if I just quietly shout punk! once from the corner of the room?)
.-= Fabeku’s lastest post: Now That
Punk!
That was fantastic! I just asked my husband, “what am I doing wrong? Why do people keep saying, “I love and want to buy your work” and then when I respond with the details, nothing happens?!”
I am going to be visualizing my dance floor and practicing like Frank!
Thanks!
Penny
“Come dance with me…” 🙂
Loved the article, it all sounds very familiar. I must say I haven’t had prospects bail on me yet, but I work mainly for a very select group of clients I’ve known for years. I’m lucky in that respect, I guess, that I’ve been in my line of work for a very long time and have built a network that just rocks.
But as a client… I’ve been there. One thing I missed was the boss pulling the prospect out; you know, you think you have the go-ahead from your overlords and then right before you sign the manager flies by, ditches your project with a few words, and flies away and leaves you to call everybody off.
As for your theme, as one old punk to another, you may enjoy my article on Punk Rock and SEO… 😉
http://www.defcon0.com/punk-rock-and-seo-mistakes/
Thanks, Dylan. I’m glad you haven’t struggled with that yourself, and it’s good to see how equally painful it can be on the client side. Thanks for validating that.
And I loved your article. Punk Rock SEO!
🙂
M
Hi Mark,
Yeah, exactly. What makes me good at what I do is that I’m actively on both sides of the fence. I hold a regular job on purpose; salary is less than my hourly rate by several orders of magnitude but the extra understanding of my clients it gives me is invaluable.
(And vice-versa; I keep very current in my field because I free-lance. All employers should encourage their staff to do work on the side. It gives them extra skills, keeps them current in their field and happy, no steady job offers everything you love all the time.)
Anyway, I linked to your post from my blog.
Don’t worry about linking back, I build my blog for my clients so the added value your post brings is thanks enough.
Greetz.
DD.
.-= David Dylan’s lastest post: Why People Disappear After They
So interesting, David- thanks for sharing your strategy with that. It can be really eye-opening, to stay in that employee relationship.
And thanks so much for the link- I’m glad what we did is supporting what you’re doing.
peace
Mark
I know my business has improved dramatically now the I have stopped focusing so much on the sales funnel.. and started to spend more time developing better systems once someone has said “yes”. Customer care and customer retention are just as important as customer acquisition.
It’s so true. Not only does it feel better, and in some ways is easier, but that’s where all the profit is. 🙂 Glad to hear it’s working for you.
It is frustrating when things don’t fall after the commitment is made. I think a lot has to due with communication and not being clear from the get go.
Also, a lot of times, people will say yes out of kindness when they know they can’t take on a project or have time.
Mark,
Again, thank you for offering business teaching that speaks to my need for practical, simple to understand advice that is also aligned with my heart centered values.
This was very helpful – my poor customers have been stage diving. I’m feeling inspired to set up those systems so that my customers can feel safe, knowing I’ve got the reins, what to expect, and that all is well.
In love and gratitude, Karly
Karly- you’re making quite a tour through our content- thank you! And I’m so glad this was helpful to you- it’s such a frustrating experience. Just since we’re on the subject- our February seminar is all about this dynamic- I bet you’d enjoy the heck out of it- and boost your enrollment skills in big ways. The Sacred Moment live in Portland.
When starting and maintaining a business there are so many factors needs to be considered. You staff plays a great part in making a successful business.