Updated 3/31/21
I was raised on hard work. I had a job from the time I was 12 (I delivered the Washington Post), my parents worked 6 days a week at their retail store, and there were several years when I put in very long hours into Heart of Business.
As the business developed, and the team came together, that didn’t change. It was now really hard work to consistently bring in the increased revenue that having a team demanded. I’ll be honest, it didn’t always come in consistently.
What I’ve written below is an honest look at what it’s taken us to transition, including one very hard thing I had to ask everyone on the team to do, even though it was painful.
I hope you read what I’ve written below. Because eventually, and you may already be there, your business will need help, even if you don’t intend to have a larger team. Here’s why:
Moving from the second stage to the third stage
In the middle of the second stage of business development, Concentration, things start to hum a little bit. Your marketing starts to work more predictably, you’re bringing in business. You get busy.
Then you get swamped. A lot of clients, and too much to do in the business. You don’t have enough revenue consistently to take on the kind of help you’ll really need, but you have too much to do to last for very long. So you simply don’t get it all done. For most people what falls away is the marketing, for two reasons. One is that marketing can often challenge heart-centered business people if they haven’t learned how to do it in a heart-centered way.
The other reason is that marketing requires the nurturing of new relationships, and when you are already over-busy, and especially when perhaps you might have some introvert in you, it’s just easier to not do that.
Sooner or later the clients that came in complete, and you’re a lot less busy, and you realize you better get on that marketing stick again. It works, but there’s a lag time, so you end up needing to tighten your belt. And then you get over-busy again.
One thing you must do: ignore clients
Like us, you probably pride yourself on how well you show up with your clients, how you take care of them, maybe overgive to them in ways that feel really generous and wonderful.
I remember in the early days of Heart of Business when it was mostly just me, I loved it. I loved designing a handout for a client, or writing up an exercise, or recording something extra.
We had a rough patch, though, when that wasn’t happening. We were beyond Concentration, but we were also beyond Momentum, into the fourth stage of business development, Independence, when you start to develop a larger organization. Now it was worse than in Concentration, when I would feel overwhelmed with my clients. Now, in Independence I was not only dropping balls around my clients, we were dropping balls with the team’s clients.
We also made some big mistakes with our premium year-long program (that we no longer run). Most of them were fixable, but we also ended up giving some refunds to people, because of some pretty big dropped balls.
Les McKeown described this general pattern in his book Predictable Success, which I highly recommend.
During this rough patch I leaned into a lot of friends and colleagues, including Les, and people like Charlie Gilkey, Terry St. Marie, my mastermind group of Jen Louden, Molly Gordon, Eric Klein, Michael Bungay-Stanier, Michele Lisenbury Christensen, and, of course, our team.
There were many things we had to do to move the business forward, but I’ll tell you what the hardest thing is.
I’m guessing that you, too, will find it the hardest thing to do. And if you don’t do it, you won’t get out of the struggle cycle.
Our first in-person team retreat
In the midst of the worst of this, a team member suggested we have a team retreat, that we get everybody together in one room as much as possible.
Then we did something that would make most people squirm. We spent a loooong time just listing out all the problems in the business. Everything that we could think of that wasn’t working. We filled long sheets with them and stuck them to the wall. Some were things that were broken, some were things that would be ideal that we didn’t have.
It was humbling. But I have to tell you, sitting in that room, looking at all those sheets of paper with their lists on it, I breathed a huge sigh of relief. Now I could actually *see* what was going on.
We prioritized the lists, created projects, and planned out the next six months. Six months later we did it again. Six months later we did it again. We kept tackling what wasn’t working and changing it for the better.
But here’s the thing we often had to do to get there.
Stop picking up balls
There were so many dropped balls at that point, I’m ashamed to think about it. I’m not talking about missed appointments (although occasionally that happened too), but more like links that were broken that they told us about. Or handouts that hadn’t been updated. Or phone calls that weren’t returned as quickly as we would like.
The entire team, we were all wiped out working hard trying to keep the balls in the air. Trying to pick up balls that had been dropped.
You see, since I was the owner, they didn’t want to disappoint me. They didn’t want a client complaint to come back to me that they were supposed to have handled before it became a complaint.
It had to come from me. I had to tell people: “Stop picking up balls. Stop running around putting out fires. We’re not a 911 service, no one is bleeding to death. We have to focus.”
That’s what I’m telling you. If this is where you are, you have to stop picking up dropped balls.
What you have to do instead
The three points below are too general to create a to-do list, but, hey, it’s an article. You’ll need more help than an article.
But here it is: you have to identify what’s not working, and then you have to find systems that remedy those, and implement them.
For some things, it will mean investing in software or a platform, and the help it takes to get it set up. And maybe the help it takes to run it. We spent thousands of dollars, in both cash and in team hours, to switch to Infusionsoft and get it running the way we wanted. It’s made our lives TREMENDOUSLY easier, but it was hard work to get there.
For some things, it means doing or giving less. When you’re new in business, you’re a go-getter. You give a lot to people, some of it from insecurity, some of it from generosity. Regardless, you end up giving a LOT. The trick is finding out what is truly over-giving, that your clients don’t really need, versus the special touches that actually are special and need to stay.
You will probably need to look at, and change, your business model, or at least your pricing. A business model is how you bring money in. If you are primarily bringing money in through one-to-one services, you need to do the math about whether you can meet both your business and personal needs through that. If not, change is in the air. 🙂
It’s REALLY Hard
You may lose a client or three over it, clients you can ill afford to lose. You may end up working extra hours you don’t want to work. We had to look at our relationship to our practitioners and we realized we were giving too much to them… THAT was really hard, taking away percentages of revenue. We used to ask a lot more of them, but as we built up systems, we asked less, and so we needed to pay less out, so we could pay for the systems. 🙁
But here’s the thing: we prolonged our pain by picking up dropped balls for FAR too long. If I had come to this several years earlier, or had known about it before we got there, we could’ve considerably shortened the time we were in pain.
I almost wrote “or eliminated it” but I’m not sure if it’s possible to completely eliminate it, any more than it’s possible to completely eliminate anger, sadness or grief. The Dalai Lama still feels those painful emotions, but he feels them for moments, as opposed to many people who may get stuck in one of those emotions for days, months or years.
If you haven’t hit this point yet in your business, don’t get overwhelmed trying to stave it off, but do stay awake to noticing when systems could be helpful. Do stay awake to over-giving. And notice, do the math, if you can really make the money you need to make doing what you’re doing.
Noticing those things may not call for immediate changes or implementation. If you’re new, you can’t suddenly double your price to meet your eventual income goal. But you can keep an eye on it and raise it as you gain experience.
If you have hit this point, maybe awhile ago, then get busy leaving those dropped balls on the ground and focusing. Because…
It’s REALLY Worth It
It’s worth it because you get out of the cycle of pain. Most weeks our core team is working about 20 or 30 hours/week. We could probably work harder and “go for it,” in moving toward our goals, but the truth is that we’re all over 40, some of us well over 40, and we don’t wanna.
We are going for it, because we’re wanting Heart of Business to reach the next level of development. But we’re not acting like a Silicon Valley start-up, fueled by twenty-somethings fueled by caffeine (and other substances), working 60-80 hours weeks out of some false machismo or I don’t know what.
Instead, we’re staying attentive to our spiritual practices, our heart’s connection, and our priorities. We’re staying focused, staying present, and moving it along.
It’s so much fun this way.
I know you love what you do, and I want to tell you your business *can* feel as fun and as nourishing, as long as you walk it through the development it needs.
I’d love to hear your reactions, questions and experiences below.
Possible Next Steps
Virtual Spiritual Business Retreat, April 30
To get clear, you often need to take space to go deeply within and listen. It’s something I consistently work with my clients on. To run a business, you need spaciousness, so you can make decisions from wisdom and not reaction and depletion.
It’s why I recommend going on retreat, and I’ve led nearly 100 of these Virtual Spiritual Business Retreats since 2005. Usually they are only available to members of our Learning Community, but from time to time I lead one that anyone can join.
April 30th. 24 hours. Go deep. Clear the clutter in your heart. Receive guidance and healing in your business. Pay from the heart.
Take a look: Heart of Business Virtual Spiritual Business Retreat.
Learning Community: Where a rising tide lifts all boats
Our Community is designed to provide affordable access to coaching, training and spiritual transformation in business and an active community of learning and support. All priced at pay-from-the-heart. Although it’s closed to new members at the moment, if you join the waiting list, you may be able to get in before our next enrollment period.
Check out our Learning Community.
Or… Don’t know what you need?
Take our free Readiness Assessment. We can help you learn where your business is developmentally within the 4 stages of business development and where you need to focus to help it grow to the next stage.
Click here for a Readiness Assessment.
With love,
Mark, and the rest of the Heart of Business Team
26 Responses
Grateful for this, Mark, giving me lots to think about. You wrote about adding technology; in my case I am in the midst of finishing a book contracted by Norton Publishing. I’ve already missed the first deadline. I realized in this past month that in order to meet my updated deadline of the end of December I’ll have to take a week off every month to focus. I’ve had to sit in the nausea of not meeting my editor’s goals and not fulfilling my clients needs in the ways I usually do. Hard to do. Certainly orients me to trusting the deep heart of the world.
Deirdre- I so hear you about missed deadlines and needing to face that. It’s hard to do, and sounds like you are being oriented in beautiful ways. Books take a lot of birthing! Here’s to beautiful focus.
Thank you for that post! This feeling of having too many balls in the air and not doing what I should be doing is one that has overwhelmed me for about a year now.
In my case, I’ve learnt that I actually need to say NO to prospective clients that aren’t actually my ideal client. Very hard to do as I still want to help and there is still this little voice telling me I could/should be doing something for them. So I have to remind myself that I’m probably not the best person to help them and they will get better support from someone else.
Thank you too for the reminder that I don’t have to work like crazy as I was still in my 20s. I really needed to hear that that is OK too.
Sabine- You are so welcome. And yes, let’s all take a breath for sanity. Even those in their 20s don’t have to work like that (unless they really wanna. And then, hopefully, only for short period.)
HOORAY! I am so happy to see you sharing this truth, Mark. Last year wasn’t the easiest for Heart of Business, and to see you coming through the other side with more peace, ease, and flow is beautiful. To see you sharing those lessons with your audience is even more wonderful, because too few companies are willing to be this honest with their audience. Excited to see you moving toward that next step on the horizon!
Lisa- You were there for some of that, and so grateful for your contributions! Thank you!
i think that there’s a lot of agreement in hearing about the less work hours and balance being important and not being a 911 service. i’ve been catching it more and more often, the times when I’m responding to life as if its an emergency. Putting one’s heart first somehow isn’t easy but it seems like its getting easier with continued reminding myself, of what’s important, of who and how i want to be in the world.
Sandra- I really hope so. May all keep reminding each other…
Thank you for your transparency and honesty about your own business development process. It’s so affirming to hear that the tendency to over-give is natural as we are in the building cycle for our business. (I thought I had invented a slick get-ahead technique.)
Now I see that I’m just putting myself in a position for burn-out. Taking good care of our (over forty) selves – who knew that THAT is the way to do this well?
Lori- Oh yes, over-giving is so natural. And so glad you see that you’re in position for burn-out. Let’s stop that in it’s tracks! 🙂
Your honesty is very inspiring!!
Thank you, Donna. Honesty is the only thing that serves.
Mark, I am so glad you brought up this idea of SYSTEMS. Over and over again, I have found that this aspect has been missing in most of my business trainings. Marketing yes, but how do you DEAL with all those clients you have coming in without proper systems in place to handle them.? Ultimately, I realized that this is the area that is causing me most most pain, time, and energy in my business. And although I have identified some things (including some software) that can help,there is still so much to systems, operations, and planning that I feel that I am lacking – particularly as a sole practitioner with a creative mind that can occasionally go into hyperdrive!. Lol! How do you even identify what you need when you don’t know what is out there? I’ve been wondering about approaching HOB for awhile wondering if they might be interesting in looking at this down-to-earth nitty gritty part of business that can still, I am sure, be heart centered and meaningful. (I know Lincoln does a lot of this – sound interesting?). Just thought I would ask – because I am actively looking for this kind of support right now. Thanks so much for the lovely article!
Hi Tabitha- yes SYSTEMS! I so agree. We do offer this kind of support, and we do it in our individual and group coaching- we don’t (yet) have a curriculum around it, although it’s on the list to develop that.
If you’re interested, I would look at working with either Steve Mattus or Lincoln Wachtel- they are both fantastic at it.
Thank you for your really kind words. I’m excited for this next phase.
Wonderful timing with this, Mark, and I’m so grateful for your sharing of your process around this–how it unfolded, how it felt, what you did about it, how that felt. Also very grateful for your focusing in on those 3 areas of focus, so far as determining what’s not working and what to do about it.
My partner and I are needing to work with all 3 areas–individually in business practice and in business partnership.
I’ve been exploring new systems…and implementing a couple small-scale organizational ones (Steve’s Evernote video helped so much, as did the first lesson in the HCN course).
I’ve also been letting go of doing so much for clients…trying to offer less, but in ways that are more targeted, more useful.
And my business model has completely transformed, thanks to Foundations1, though I don’t feel like I’ve got it “right” yet…and something still needs to change (likely in packaging and in pricing). Still, it has been evolving in wonderful ways.
Another big place of work–and struggle–for me currently is letting go of clients when the fit is not ideal (or at least approaching ideal). This only pertains to several clients, but is really hard. And yet, I’m clear in my Heart it needs to be done…creating space for more of who and what I want to come in. Each time I do it, I feel such ease–as though a huge weight is lifted. But I also feel fear around it–like, who am I to not take in anyone that helps pay the bills?
Foundations1 and 2 work has been so pivotal in helping me connect with the path my Heart longs for…and move in that direction rather than from fear-based reaction. Still, very much a work in progress.
Dana- you have come so far with what you’ve been learning and implementing- it’s truly inspiring. And Foundations2 puts you exactly where you should be. And systems and support is definitely the next step. When we spoke months ago, I mentioned this time would come, and now you are getting pretty close to ready for individual or group coaching to implement those pieces. It’s so beautiful to see. 🙂
And yes, the business model takes some shaking out to get “right” – at least to get it working for the stage you’re in.
Ahhh this is a breath of fresh air.
I think there are seasons in our business where it does get busier, and adding more team members makes it more complex, too. I love that you and your team have such great work/life balance and that you’ve worked on your systems to allow you to do that.
Often we think we should just be able to jump to that point, but there’s a big learning and implementation curve in between. We’re constantly learning this ourselves!
Nathalie- so glad it was a breath of fresh air. I know- I wish we could just jump, and similar to taking on any worthwhile project, the satisfaction and joy comes in the doing of it, not in the achieving, right?
My reaction to reading this was “Oh, thank God.”
I have been through so many transitions over the past few years (in fact, I’ve noted that my *life* is a point of transition) that a current theme that keeps coming up revolves around acceptance of What Is and letting go of both what has been and what I’d have liked it to be in order to make room for Now and what I’m building.
Thank you for the validation that yes, larger dreams require sacrifice — because releasing those dropped balls *is* a sacrifice (of service, of connections, of seeing myself as nurturing/competent/giving etc) and deserves to be honored as such. <3
Rachel- Yes, thank God! And yes, to the grief of letting go of self-image, of sacrificing so much. Thank you for that, and I send prayers to you on your journey, as well.
Mark, I really appreciate your vulnerability. These are the sorts of stories and insights that you don’t hear about growing a business.
You’re someone whose sense of ethics and integrity I look up to, so to hear that even YOU need to give yourself permission to drop balls and focus on the bigger picture gives me a sense that it’s OK to do the same. Can’t be pruning trees while the forest is burning down.
With so much appreciation,
Peter
Peter- I know- I try to tell it like it is, even when it’s vulnerable. And yes, it’s so critical to be focused and just do what you can. Even when I did work in a 911 service, it was the same thing. You do what you can, and if you can’t… well, you’re only human. At least the stakes aren’t quite as high here.
Everyone else’s comments put it so well. Thank you Mark for your honesty and open heart.
With love,
Susan
Susan- thank you for your kind words- so glad they touched you.
Thank you for sharing with such honesty. I felt this huge relief and resonance at the end of the article when you shared that you all want to be working about 20 hours a week. That’s what I’m built for, and it’s do good for me to see others making it work.
Emily- It’s such a relief to have a shorter work schedule. Every time my work week surges upward, because of a project or deadline, I’m reminded of why I want the shorter work week.