When clients come to Heart of Business, it’s really common for folks to have a “it’s broken, I need to fix it!” sense of their own business.
At the same time, there’s a lot of pushback against a “fix it” approach. “Something is terrible wrong, and I need to fix it,” when unconsciously expressed, is at the root of mansplaining, of dysfunctional relationship dynamics, and it’s just an all-around bummer, especially when what most people really respond well to is empathy and care.
Yet… sometimes things really are broken and need to be fixed! Our washing machine broke over the summer, and I was really proud of myself to be able to figure out what was going on (after watching youtube videos on the topic), ordering an $11 part, and then fixing it without needing to call a repair person!
Similarly, we had a really troubling problem in our membership site software that needed to be fixed, because it was causing access problems. Blah!
So, clearly, “fix it” energy isn’t always bad.
In my book, Heart Centered Business, I have an entire chapter devoted to “you can be trusted with your business” because it’s a nuanced and profound topic that blocks a lot of people in business development. And, there’s a key discernment at heart of it.
Tending versus fixing.
I have Abigail Rose Clarke and her book Returning Home to Our Bodies to thank for the language around “tending” (her book is so fantastic…)
The question to be asking in your business: is the thing you are looking at actually broken, or is it not broken, and just needing tending, care, development?
Broken almost only applies to a thing, a process, an application, an object of some sort. Something designed to do a thing, and there is a thing that is broken, and it needs to be fixed.
Sometimes it’s hard to discern. I see folks struggle, for instance, with the sales conversation, as one example. Often it needs tending to, meaning attention and love, some healing, and some real understanding.
And, often, also, there is a part of the process that is broken. A misunderstanding of selling learned from exploitative models, and a script or step that is actually missing or that doesn’t function well.
Why this is important in 2025.
I’m achingly aware of how over capacity our nervous systems are, and how much there is in the world that feels hard and heavy. I also am in wonder of the amount of goodness and beauty and love that I witness on a daily basis.
Both of these are true.
When we are depleted or over capacity, the “fix it” approach seems simpler. The “tending” seems like it’s more work, and takes up more of our spoons, meaning capacity.
However, it’s not true. It’s using the wrong approach that is so consuming and overwhelming.
Working on getting our membership application to work (mainly by getting help), is much more direct than having our team overwhelmed with client care because of problems, and just trying to manually “tend to” the issue.
But trying to “fix” a business that isn’t bringing in the revenue you want, when nothing is actually broken is exhausting, depressing, and ineffective. Tending it is so much easier. Learning, putting things in place, pruning, with love and care is way more efficient, effective, and easier on the heart and the spoons than trying to fix what ain’t broken.
For this next year, as you dream and plan and muse upon your intentions and goals for your business, please include the discernment of what is actually broken that might need to be fixed, versus what is not broken at all, and yet needs tending and care, so it can develop.
With love,
Mark Silver, M.Div.
Heart of Business, Inc.
When you want to make a difference,
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2 Responses
This is such a relatable perspective, Mark! The distinction you’ve made between the “fix it” mentality and approaching challenges with empathy is so important. It’s easy to get caught up in the idea that something is fundamentally wrong, which can create unnecessary stress and dysfunction. However, as you pointed out, there are times when things genuinely need fixing—and the key is finding a balanced, compassionate approach. Your story about the washing machine is a great example of tackling problems with resourcefulness and calm. Thanks for sharing this insight!
This perspective on “fix it” energy is incredibly insightful, Mark! It’s so true that we often rush to label things as broken without considering the possibility that they just need some care and attention. Your analogy with the washing machine really resonates; sometimes, the solution is simpler than we think. I appreciate the emphasis on empathy and tending over just fixing. It’s a refreshing approach that encourages us to nurture our businesses rather than just troubleshoot problems. Thank you for sharing this valuable insight!