Humbling by the editing process and so much more…

As I write this, I’m deep into the editing process with my book, which is a humbling and exciting experience.

This whole season feels incredibly humbling. Our twin boys, young teens, just started back to school. It’s the first year on this property, and we at times feel overwhelmed tending the land. The adventures with that all-too-familiar illness over the last two years really made it difficult for us to weave community in the ways we know how.

Also. Oh. By the way. I turned 54 a week ago, and being in my mid-fifties, is definitely humbling.

And, did I mention I’m editing my book, which is supposed to be launched this coming early spring? Although I’ve coached, watched, been involved with, I’ve never launched my own published book before. Humbling.

Years ago I had a tiresome joke with other team members, “I’m more humble than you are! I’m the *most* humble!”

But, when you find yourself with competence, even mastery, in certain things, humility is sometimes harder to access. I don’t mean that I find myself ego-inflated. (At least I hope not. You’d tell me if I were, right?) What I mean is that the vulnerability, beginner’s mind, empty-cup attitude is deeply needed, and I don’t always want to embrace it.

Instead, I want to lean into confidence, experience, knowing what I’m doing.

However, I’m being confronted with too many new things at one time, and I’m being forced into a very familiar position… down on my knees, prostrated to the ground, asking for support and help. Help from friends, from team, from family. And also just directly from the Divine.

If you’re in business, I have no doubt that what I’m describing rings some kind of truth for you. Either it’s currently true, was recently true, or is about to be true.

This little writing is just a reminder for myself, and perhaps you, too, that:

• It’s okay to soothe the nervous system. To do something familiar, so that not everything feels uncertain.

• To do less, to not pack in as much, because doing new things requires more learning, more integration, and just more “figuring it out” time.

• To move physically in whatever way one can. Physical movement helps to integrate so much. I’m grateful to be able to take breaks from editing to work in the garden.

• To be healthy with food, whatever that looks like for you. For me, I’m eating less at each meal, knowing how much energy is taken up just by digesting, and how much it doesn’t feel good to eat beyond my capacity. It’s hard, because food is one of the ways I learned to soothe myself, but being with the discomfort is healthier.

Whatever new things that have arrived in your life that are humbling you, may you be nourished and cared-for as you walk with them. May we all be the ground for each other, lifting each other up.

And, oh Allah, may I finish editing this book this week… or get as close as I can.

With love and care,
Mark silver, M.Div.
Heart of Business, inc.
Every act of business can be an act of love.

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